How to Talk about Condoms with Your Partners
If you’re sexually active, using condoms correctly and consistently is a great way to protect your sexual health. Don’t be shy to talk with your partners about safer sex and condoms.
How to talk with your partners about condoms and safer sex
- Sometimes people don’t like to use protection for sex, so it can be helpful to think about how you might respond if you’re ever with a partner who doesn’t want to use a condom. Remember, you have a right to protect yourself and your health, and using condoms is a way to take care of your partner too – so you’re not being selfish at all.
- Talk this over with your partner before you start to have sex. You might even want to select and buy condoms together. When it’s hot and heavy it might be easy to have sex without a condom “just this once.”
- Plan ahead and have condoms with you if you think you might want to have sex. Don’t rely on a sexual partner to have condoms.
You may have sexual partners who have specific reasons for not wanting to use condoms. Look over this list to get ideas about how to respond if you ever feel pressured to have sex without a condom:
“I don't like sex as much with a condom. It doesn't feel the same.”
“This is the only way I feel comfortable having sex but believe me, it’ll still be good even with protection! And it lets us both just focus on each other instead of worrying about all that other stuff…”
“I don't have any kind of disease! Don't you trust me?”
“Of course I trust you, but anyone can have an STI and not even know it. This is just a way to take care of both of us.”
“I didn't bring any condoms.”
“I have some, right here.”
“I don't know how to use them.”
“I can show you – want me to put it on for you?”
“Let's just do it without a condom this time.”
“It only takes one time to get pregnant or to get an STI. I just can’t have sex unless I know I’m as safe as I can be.”
“No one else makes me use a condom!”
“This is for both of us…and I won’t have sex without protection. Let me show you how good it can be – even with a condom.”
“I'm [or you're] on the pill.”
“But that doesn’t protect us from STIs, so I still want to be safe, for both of us.”
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